Tuesday, May 29, 2012

a change of space


My parents recently sold their 6-acre home of 22 years to downsize into a more manageable space, a lovely condo closer to town. This past weekend, my husband and I returned to help with the impending move. Although I didn't grow up here, I spent my senior year of high school in this house, summers and holidays during college, as well as several months in between job searches and travels...not to mention, countless visits home since I've been married. Through all this time, I've still had my own bedroom. It's had slight transformations over the years as my mom made subtle changes, a new chair here, a new picture there, while winter coats and wool blankets slowly took over the closet. The single bed from high school was replaced with a queen-sized one during my college years, and then traded in again for an antique, four-poster from my grandparent's home, the inevitable consequence of a death & subsequent move to independent living. The one constant has been the bedroom set made up of a dresser, tall chest, nightstand and "make-up" table. I managed to hold onto on a couple of drawers and shelves across the years filled with stacks of books and photo albums, mementoes from my travels, a wedding gown, veil and fancy shoes. For the most part, nothing drastic has changed until this weekend when we boxed up the rest of my things to bring back to Philly, gave my bedroom set away for its new life in another home and put the four-poster into storage. All that's left is a mattress, some lamps and a few chairs. 

I didn't think it would bother me. These changes. The loss of this space. The closing of one chapter, the beginning of another, and on the surface, it hasn't. Yet, as I walked around the house on Friday night, I found myself hostage to bittersweet memories and overcome with nostalgia and wishing, in that moment, that the folks would stay put, allowing me to hold on to the past before family holidays dwindled in numbers as my grandparents passed away and my sister moved abroad, or before we'd lost Max the cat (my soulmate) or Abby and Ben our canine replacements. Later on, as I lay in my Poppop's four-poster bed, I took a moment to record my thoughts in my journal and embedded my image on a memory card. After shooting my reflection, I snapped off a few random pictures of the room from this vantage point and went to bed. 


The thing about changes, good or bad, expected or unforeseen, is how they push us towards something new allowing us to redefine our space, or maybe even our place in the world. It can be like shedding our skin…or maybe daring to look "pretty in pink" like kristin~mainemomma did by adding a little something special to her hair…

136 :: pretty in pink

...or having the courage to move forward, despite being tired, into a new job, in a new state after losing a family business of 38 years like 6ftmama

its beyond my control.....

...or maybe, as I found out, it can be simply giving away the bedroom furniture you've had since you were 10. So even though my space has changed, there's a new one waiting for me across town. And although we've lost some family members, in just a few weeks, we'll be getting a visit from the new ones we've gained. My sister comes to visit with her two children, and my parents have just picked out a puppy for their new home.

How about you? Any big changes taking place in your life now?

Holly ~ Soupatraveler 






10 comments:

Linda said...

Really lovely post, Holly!
It's funny how change can affect us. How a thing can illicit such a nostalgic emotion in us. I think that letting go of things is very healing. Changes happens for a reason. I hear how you are letting go of the things, cherishing the memories and embracing the people (old and new) in your life.
That's what matters.

xo,
Linda

Deirdre Malfatto said...

Wow, Holly, that is a big change.
Ours are not so visible from the outside, but my family is undergoing a change for the positive. We are leaving behind some of the sadness of the last few years and having the kinds of wonderfully happy family moments that I had begun to give up on. And as this happens, we are all looking toward personal change as well.

Kristin Zecchinelli said...

oh yes change is the one constant isn't it? bittersweet
xo holly.

pictress said...

Hahaha! Absolutely. I think we should have a drink all together right now … :) Love your words! And the pictures, od course! x

Vanessa/NessieNoodle said...

this past year has been full of SO many changes... I lost my job of 9 years last summer and have been in two different jobs since then. My husband also changed jobs due to instability at his former work place. Because of the job loss, it was impossible for us to stay in our home- we were really underwater with the mortgage and so we did a short sale. that meant a move- we have been living with my in-laws since December. If that isn't a change in life style, I don't know what is! It has been a year of change, a year of growth and a year of compromise. But I really do think all of these things are or have prepared us for something bigger and better....

Angela Fanton said...

Beautiful words and photographs ... change comes whether we want it to or not and I love the way it can catch us off guard and reward us with something even better than before (which is usually the case) to share with the people we love the most. :)

Life with Kaishon said...

Oh no. I am sorry it was so hard to say goodbye. I hope your parents adjust beautifully.

mosey (kim) said...

My parents sold the house I grew up in the year I was married. They were delighted to start afresh in a condo, while I sighed a lot and mourned the loss of the place that held the bulk of my life's memories. I'm over it now (12 years later), and those memories are still as clear and warm as when I was able to walk through the actual house.

Such an evocative post, Holly. My best to your folks!

sara aka 6ftmama said...

um yah this was so perfect since tomorrow my last day... im overwhelmed happy and blessed ... i keep reminding myself of all the good coming off the loss.... i hope... thank you a 100xs for this.. love you!

Shail said...

Miss you already neighbor

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